Flatter than the Flatlands 2003

Flatter than the flatlands comp
Birchip, Victoria, Easter, 2003
by Hugh Alexander

For the uninitiated, the flatter than the flatlands comp is a ground towing comp held over the Easter weekend with a base in the Mallee town of Birchip, NE Victoria. Generally the weather that time of year isn’t all that hot, with light winds, and light thermals of 100-400’ per min. This year the wind was even lighter and more variable than usual, making it difficult for the Meet Head to choose an end of the paddock to tow from and for the task committee to choose a task that would be downwindish, as the comp caters for all classes of gliders from floaters to topless, and all skill levels.

DAY 1
The weather chart showed that there would be a light southerly blowing. The task was set, eventually to Roseberry, west of the paddock. The climb out was a slow one, taking me 45 minutes to finally arrive at 4500’. The nil to tail take off making it a task in itself for many pilots to launch. 20 pilots made it to goal, the day being won by Tim Osbourne followed by Scott Barret and Rohan Holtkamp in third.

DAY 2
Warwick Duncan normally presents the previous days winner with the Superman suit that he/she must don, and wear for the morning, making sure the townsfolk of Birchip know that they truly have a god in their midst’s. Alas due to the fact that Warwick had just moved residence, the suit was misplaced. It was seen to be Beavo’s (you can’t keep a good pilot down) fault, and it stunk of Rohan Holtkamp anyhow. Again a Southerly was predicted. We set up at the west end of the paddock, so as to take advantage of the tail and nil wind takeoffs again. This day provided for some spectacular takeoffs and landings indeed. On strip two the dolly was providing light entertainment for the southern end of the field, as it trundled up the off camber track, it would twist, wallow and brake as the light dust built in front of the wheels. The onlookers winced and oohed as the tow line reefed the gliders into the air, or dirt. Warwick provided the local farmers with a new plough in the form of his helmet. Ann Moss of the Cumulo Bimbo team, whilst thermalling out, and still over the take off, dropped her pack up gear from the harness onto the ground. Her sister was heard to say, “She was always such a messy girl”. The days task was Hopetoun on the Henty Hwy, approximately 60 km west of the paddock. Light thermals greeted the competitors who were able to leave the paddock. First for the day was Scott Barret with Tim Osbourne 2nd and Greg Holt 3rd.

DAY 3
Easter Sunday brought eggs to the children of the camp site, and eggs being thrown from the front of the RSL hall by the comp director, at the competitors. Note, solid chocolate eggs can hurt. Another southerly predicted, light and variable in the paddock. The thermals seemed lighter than the previous day. Pilots where strewn along the course to Beulah, again west of the paddock. Only 5 guns made it to goal. The master Rohan Holtkamp won the day, the Scott Barret Show 2nd and Tony Lowrey 3rd.

DAY 4
The wind finally became more the southerly that was predicted, still light and variable, but this time we used the eastern end of the paddock for towing, although this end became crossed after half of the field had left the paddock, making take offs rather impossible. The climbs out were slow and hard to core. The shorter task for the last day was Ultima, 43 k’s to the north. I watched Jo Cooper flying low over a farmhouse searching for that elusive thermal to help make goal. Her shadow grew larger and she finally touched down. Unluckily the house was deserted. Jo climbed to the top of a silo to get a signal out and reported her position. Her ground crew found the farm, located a farmer who let them in through the locked gate. As they drove up the drive, Jo was standing on top of the silo waving franticly and shouting over the wireless “I’m here! I’m here!” Jo being from the Cumulo Bimbo team, earned the name ‘Jo “Cumulo Standing on a Silo Waving” Bimbo’. Winner for the day ? Scott Barret, Rohan Holtkamp in second and Brent Telford 3rd.

Results
3rd Tim Osbourne
2nd Rohan Holtkamp
1st Scott Barret.

There was a collective sigh from the Birchip R.S.L when Warwick informed the crowd that he was resigning as the meathead of the comp after 11 years of service to the hang gliding community. He will be missed with the wit and jocularity that he brings. Warwick has said that he will just enjoy flying the comp next year. The other half of the dynamic duo, the silent partner, Beavo is staying on albeit in a lesser role than the current level of activity. Hope to see you all there next year.

Hugh “Incoming Meat Head” Alexander

THE PASSING OF THE BATON

By Warwick Duncan

After eleven years of running the Birchip Competition and organising it with Beavo, it is time to pass the responsibility on. As Beavo and I reminisced after the presentation this year we observed that it was a little like having your child leave home after nurturing it and seeing it grow for all those years.

Eleven years is a long time in anyone’s language. For much of the nineties I was your typical single and single-minded hang glider pilot. Running the competition during this period was just an extension of what I did every weekend anyway. But life changes and there I was this year with my wife Jo and baby Nicholas and surrounded by my old hang gliding friends, many with kids themselves.

Reading Hugh’s article above it is apparent that it is time for a change. During the presentation I complained of the difficulty I had this year picking the tow direction. Someone called out from the crowd that maybe I should have had a look at the forecast as a southerly was actually forecast each day! A good point! In the early days of the competition we had a detailed forecast and even toyed with temperature traces. This year I didn’t even get around to buying the paper in the morning! The competition was still successful this year and everyone had a good time but it is clear that it is not as well run as a few years ago.

The good news is that the future of the competition is looking bright. At a recent meeting a new committee was formed with the irrepressible Hugh Alexander volunteering as Meat Head. Anyone who saw his break dancing at the competition this year will know he has what it takes! Joining him is Ian Rees who put his hand up as coordinator. Just as importantly we have a great core group of volunteers to spread the workload. I feel extremely comfortable putting the responsibility in their hands.

The people I wish to thank are too numerous to mention but if you have ever done anything to help with the competition then you are one of them. In the emotion of the final presentation I did forget to thank one person, probably the most important one of all. Beavo. For without his knowledge of competitions the Flatter than the Flatlands would definitely never have evolved past a drunken idea in a pub. And it should also be recognised that for the past two years he has done the bulk of the organization himself. The other person I would specifically like to thank is Wes Hill who has run the scoring for the competition every single year. A task he has become so good at that he can churn out scores even while off his face on cider. A very useful attribute at Birchip.

The Flatter than the Flatlands Competition has become a great institution in Victorian hang gliding and I wish the new committee well. I look forward to participating in it for the next 11 years (if I can get in!).

Warwick “Outgoing Meat Head” Duncan